All four sides of faith

 You then think: "This should have happened, and I don't know why it didn't happen. I made a lot of effort. I thought about it very carefully, but..." There is a difference in your thinking and in it actually happening. This means that not all four sides of faith are strong, and the amusing thing is that you say that it is the drama: "It is the drama, it is the drama", yet, at the same time, you also fluctuate a great deal. Sometimes, there is fluctuation in your thoughts, sometimes there is fluctuation in your words and sometimes there is even fluctuation in your actions.